This will be really quick

I just saw the saddest ASPCA commercial I've ever seen in my life. I almost cried. It was horrifically cute animals with their names and a little sentence like "nathaniel...never loved and left to die" and "blondie...abandoned and dying of a broken heart." Those are verbatim from the commercial. And I honestly don't give a fuck if those are in any way true  or if they're total propaganda, because animal suffering is real.

And so it just inspired me that whatever I do in life, whatEVER it is, I am going to adopt as many dogs as I can. Not at a time - I don't want to have a farm. But I'm not going to always get puppies either. If there's a sweet old 11 year old dog, I'll take it, because those are always so hard to get rid of. A fiesty 5 year old? I'll take it. In my life, I want to save as many dog's lives as I can.

The way I was made

Hello guys. I guess I should start out by explaining that I'm more stoned than ever. One full bowl. Just one. It was a lot, but it was just one. The bathroom REAKS! I drowned it in a febreze knockoff, but only morning will tell....and I'm so high.

I wish I had a high def camera to take a picture of it....it's so great.
Ah wow. The way i was made, by griffin house, is....it's really fucking good. I don'tk now if there IS a song better than this. It's just so raw sounding and funky. Here we go, the verse when he gets made!

Okay I'm sketching the fuck out. Earlier when elizabeth was over we kept hearing thumping noises coming from outside the house. I just heard it again and it reallllly scared me.

Aww haha I can't be scared or sad anymore becuase If we ever meet again is playing!!! Shuffle!!! This song will always make me happy!! ANyway, when elizebeth was over, we were talking about the best way to die. Actually, I was just like, "That noise soundedlike a comet"
and she was like "A commet becca?"
and i'm like "whatever, a meteor or something. Actually, if a meteor crashed in here, I couldn't be upset, Because that's the most amasing way to die.'"
her: "It's instant, and it's really really awesome"

I'LL NEVER BE THE SAAAAME
IF WE EVER MEET AGAIN
WONNNNNN'T LET YOU GET AWAAAAAYYY!!!
IF WE EVER MEET AGAIN!
THIS FEE FALLS OH GOT ME SO OH
KISS ME ALL NIGHT DONT EVER LET ME GO
I'LL NEVER BE THE SAAAAME
IF WE EVER MEET AGAIN!!!

sorrry. Anywayl number one beset way to day: get struck by a meteor.

Haaaaa. Oh my god i just red that sentence and i said "day" instead of "DIE". i am so STUPID hahahaha! And when i saw that i just loled! Beset way to day? Like wtf. If you know what I'm talking about then thumbs up man, cuz i bet when i read this I won't even know what I'm trying to say....

Ahhhh I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO WATCH THE SIMPSONS, OR READ MY BOOK
I' THINK I'LL WATCH THE SIMPSONS FIRST THEY'RE MORE MINDLESS HAHAHAHAHA
LEMME GO LOAD ONE NOW AHHAHAHHA
DON'T KNOW WHY I'M PSYCHO LAUGHING.....
but Elizabeth, if you are reading, HAHAHHAHHAA.

This is beyond control. I'm getting it together. Hold on. AHHH ONE FOOT BOY IS PLAYING RIGHT AFTER IF WE EVER MEET AGAIN!!! HAhaha holy shit! I should be sprinting a mile not sitting in bed! Whatever....

If tubthumping plays after this though, I'm going to have to cut myself. Sorry but it's the truth.
My head is like moving to the music it's weeeirrd.

I can't not dance! Could totally go for sushi right onow...just saying....

Ulcer, by the sea captains, is actually a really cute song. It doesn't like capture my attention like hey soul sister or collie man, but it's a chill song and it's nice! I can't just skip it wiehout turning around and deciding o take a listen! Hah.

Well, I don't want to wait for this song to finish because I want to watch my simpsons, so i'll be leaving now! Guys, thanks for reading! You know, at this point, I don't know how many people have read this, but whoever has, you're cool!!!!

It's like I'm a Cracked,com writer! Complete with stupid 

photo captions!

Well, now Jai ho is playing....I still have to go though guys. Wait for the chorus though.....This song makes me realize something. I mean, listen to the lyrics. "You are the reason that I breathe, you are the reason that I still believe, yo uare my destiny, jai ho!"

That's beautiful. You are the reason that I breathe? Think about that. People who are really in love, I mean really, that's how they feel. And that feeling, that power of love, can overcome a human's basic central internal will to survive. And you just think about all the songs, the movies, the books, plays, poems and paintings all based on love. When money is beginning to take reign over the world, the only combative power capable of overcoming it is love.  It's just powerful to think aboiut that.

People listen to stuff like collie man and mellow mood (which is playing right now haha) and you know chill music or pink floyd or whatever YOu listen to stoned, that's what people say to listen to stoned. no. Just listen to  a love song. You'll know what I'm talking about. I already played this song today hold on.

 No fuck the music time for the simpsons. PEACE!

 L-)

I should be in bed....

Any minute someone could come down here and catch me. I didn't even just use one room i used TWO! The bathroom and the computer room! So basically i pulled what some would call "a dumb shit" and maybe made the whole ground level reak? Who knows. I can't tell. Hopefully mama and papa are knocked out and can't smell it. i'm always scared in the morning that mama will ask me something, but she hasn't yet, and that's pretty good news.

DANGIT i have 23 minutes left! that means i need to either get my shit together really quickly right now, get upstairs and charge it, or just leave my shit strewn about for a little longer, plug this in, and finish this. Weird it jumped to 25....not sure why it would do that but I'm not going to complain...I need to get my shit together. WENT TO TWENTY SIX GOOD NEWS PEOPLE. okay i'm gonna go gather everything up, but youre not gonna notice because you're reading, you're not here with me. so it's useless for me to tell you, but there you go, you've been forewarned....

Well i'm back and that of course was nothing to you, but it was quite something for me and I just have realized that I left my little pocket book downstairs which contains none other than my bowl, weed, and sticky toothpick! I did that last night too, and as I was reading in bed, something made me realize that I left it downstairs and I grabbed it but...that could have been a disaster. Anyway, I better go grab it before I forget it's down there, which is a real threat because I just forgot what I was talking about and had to reread this paragraph like three times. See, it' be really helpful if you had some appreciation of the time lapses. Hmph....I'll invent a blog like that when I'm older......

Well, BRB!! (once again, this means nothing to you.)

Okay I'm back. I'm gonna listen to that Pogo Alice in wonderland song. :-)

Well I just listened to that and creeped on facebook for what I felt like was a long time. Come to find out, it was just like 4 minutes. Whatever. You know what's constantly frustrating me? You can't emphasize the word "I". Like, most words, it's easier to just CAPITILIZE like SO or maybe even like THIS. Or some are fancy ass and italicize! or they underline. Joke. No one really underlines except for fifth graders. Anywho...

I forget. What song shall I listen to next? MELLOW MOOD!!!!!

I have water an arm's length away..don't know why i'm not grabbing it... i might go get up and get earphones so the music is right in my ears, and still not get my water, which is just a REACH away, because i'm too lazy. and my priorities are straight, even though my throat feels like the sahara. Hehhhh...

Whoa, changed my mind! Don't wanna get the earphones at all, and I took a sip! Haha, so take what I say for a  grain of salt....

Mellow mood is mind blowing, by the way, for anyone who hasn't heard it before. Literally mind bowing. Like I kind of feel like my head is being forced back by the shear force of the music....And umm, what I was going to say before...I was going to say that I've hit the slippery slope...smoking interferred with my homework tonight. Well, let me explain. I have PFM H.W. that was to watch tv for an hour, then record this information about ALL the commercials i saw in ONE hour: time of commercial, product being advertised, length of commercial, information about product. And...well between commercial breaks of svu i was going to smoke, then I'd come back and be like crap, I didn't record any commercials! So this happened like four times til I finally stayed outside and watched them and any info I recorded definitely sounds like I was high...and I was...but I just don't care enough to go back and worry about it. Then I have an english presentation tomorrow that marshall said "You will NOT succeed if you do not practice tonight!" and uh well I didn't figure out what I'm even going to talk about, let alone practice. OH my gosh I want a sandwich right now!!!! Ergghhhhh......

See what I mean? I've hit the slope. I'm sliding down. At the bottom of the slope, there's an inky pool with a blueish reflection in the middle. It looks like the bottom, but it's not. It's bottomless. But halfway down, you meet up with the worst abominable evil being to ever exist, SHE, the mother of GRENDEL. Yes children, we're going back to Beowulf, cerca 8th grade, Ms. Mac's language arts. Remember this shit?! There was that one chapter, chapter nine, about some random kid who drowned while swimming away from dragons? Swear to god, look that up, I'm right. AND WE HAD TO RECORD EVERY COLOR THAT WAS WRITTEN IN EACH CHAPTER. Ivory, gold, red midnight, pearl, ebony, golden, saphire, crimson, maroon, turqouise, et FUCKINNG cetera.

Dang....a butterfinger commercial....see this is what this commercial accomplishes
a.) I WANT A BUTTERFINGER
b.) if i were recording the commercials, under the "new product information" column, i would have said "If you don't deserve to eat one you get zapped by lightening? I guess?" Yeah, those exact words. SLippery slope......

Well i have to save this because it's 11:38 I don't know where the time went. Good night, and good luck to all!!! <333

AYyyy wazzzuppp

Oh man guys. Gimme one second I'm just repacking my bowl! Damn, I keep getting distracted. Omegle and chatroulette won't connect to my webcam and idfk wtf the problem is but all i wanted to do was omegle! but noooooo. ahhhhhh i'm so upset......

so upset that quite frankly i kept forgetting i had more weed to smoke.

i think that once you forget you're smoking after you've been looking forward to it for 8 hours, you know you're high. So....
scuse me while i take a huff puff

Now i'm playing puff the magic dragon :)))

Jeez fucking loui'se, everything is so much more complicated when you're high. Don't even ask, it'll take me 8 million years to try to explain it.

Dang i just struggled to light my lighter....
Mind you, I couldn't light lighters til this fall, but I've mastered it since then so...another symptom!!!

Also, I always feel like I hear my parents...and in the morning I realize "Uhh you're fine dude" but I just get so worried...MONSTER HITTTT!!!! KAPOWWWW! zing zing zing ZAGGAWAAAAMP. Awwww this song. it's about marijuana.

OHhhh my god. I just spent so much time messing with that photo! this is turning depressing., S'okay, lemme play a happy jam....
Holy shit oh my god. I just went to take another hit from the bowl, so I light the lighter, and it lights and then a little fireball flies toward my hair. Ah i know I sound like a high motherfucker But I swear... that is so scary.

Just when I started playing collie man too! Oh well, gotta chill for the rest of it. mmm. You know that life and love is a heavy heavy load. THat just makes me feel like dreads. Like that last line just...inspires the image of dreads in my mind, for some reason. God. I keep forgetting I'm writing in here....then i go do other shit...now i feel kind of like i'm in a hot sweat, but it's not bad. Just...you know...out there. THink i'll play anything but fine, cuz i can't just NOT hear it tonight. :-)

pee YEW! I just took a big ol' nasty hit. Damn. I'll be done in a few minutes hopefully and get to watcy the simpsons....oh man would that be amazing. Yeah either that or comedy central whatever works. But i'm here for a little longer unless i get caught :X

Heyy back again!

        Guys, I have school tomorrow. This sucks, and I know this and excuse me, interjection. Carly just decided to interrupt me.
       Okay, she posted this status on facebook that's like "just wrote a check for $666 dollars heh heh heh."
       So my cousin comments, and this will be a direct quote ladies and gentlemen, "You're obviously in a position to teach me about being better with money my friend!! Get ready as I'm coming to be your student lol."
        So I tell her that she said that because my sister is in the position that she's able to write a 600 dollar check. And carly is like "No, Becca, it's because it's six six six"
       I'm like "UMMM NOOOOOOOOOOOO [yelled in a chewbacca voice. for the rest of the quote, read in normal screaming voice] IT'S BECAUSE YOU ARE ABLE TO GIVE AWAY SIX HUNDRED DOLLARS"
       So...I am correct. Back me up here. That would be effective except right now carly is my only follower, and I don't think she even really knows how to sign in again or how to comment or publish said comments, so the liklihood of her even reading this, let alone accomplishing a comment on it is very unlikely, so basically the only person who could potentially read this is her, and she won't, so what I'm saying is, there's no one here to back me up. Whoa okay like i typed that but it felt like it was just one long run on sentence that I was saying, so I felt like out of breath when I finished. Weird, cuz I think I was breathing that whole time...I think....

     Alright, that was really fucking hard. Guys, let mme just fill you in on what just happened. I honestly don't know why I keep having these computer adventures but so be it. Okay I typed that last sentence, and I was like oooh I'm gonna try a picture of myself looking all sketchy or whatever. Because, if you'll notice my first post, I put a picture in there (that, I originally figured out sober). Umm but yeah so I did that but only after I originally posted it. Like, I edited it. Okay so, now you see where I'm at? I know how to put the picture in, I just have to take the right one, and so I take a while to get the right one but there it is, fine. So i come on here and do the whole upload picture thing, but all the pictures I just took aren't available!!! I"m like, WTF!. So I try doing it after I close photobooth...still doesn't work. I try reopening photobooth and then closing it again. Upload still won't work. Finally, I open photobooth, and try to drag the picture to the desktop, but it's impossible cuz all the windows are in the way. So I have to rearrange the windows, and they always move and freak out and stuff when you do that, so there I am still trying to uplload the picture when finally I get all the windows in the right spot and it finally works.
         So then I have to arrange the photo...and it made it soooo hard to get it where I want! Anyway, I don't want to talk about this anymore. Explaining things is soooooooo exhausting.
       Plus, I'm watching SVU. There's a child in the car Wtf....the guuy is driving really fast....oh no we heard a collision....wtf ....




    





        Ahhh I just had another situation, The spacing got all weird when I put that photo in. See AHH what is it doing haha. Oh wait, all better now! Okay, I trust this website now. If I ever had any doubts, they are gone.
       I just had to explain this one last thing...umm don't mind my ugly shirts that's my pajama shirt I don't like wear that shit like out in public or even if the sun is still up like this is strictly bedtime shit so...just ya know keep that in mind before you judge me, right? Judge me on this!! Whoooooo.
        My elbows kind of hurt. Whaaaat is catatonia. Seriously I'm sorry but what is it. SVU just said something could lead to it. So....what is it. They made it sound like...haha like this.
      Benson: "What's so bad about the common cold?"
      Huang: "Well, it could lead to gingivitis, heart disease, rectal cancer, Ebola virus, and toe explosion"
       Benson: * Wide Eyed stare that is like OMG *

      Ugh did I mention my elbows hurt??? OOOOwwww wtf is this carpal tunnel syndrome?
      Maybe laying down would work...a little but this isn't that comfortable. Okay it's like weirdly comfortable like in a "I might get a bedsore..."
     Should I get a clemantine or ask carly to get me one?
      Duuuuuude I should have recorded that because apparently you can insert videos. I just asked her if she would, and she was like you can, and I was like I know I'm just asking if you would do that for me, and she was like why would I, and I was like for a favor, and she was like are you almost done writing? and I was like I don't know but it doesn't matter cuz you're not reading it tonight. And she was like why not? and I was likebecause you have to read it tomorrow it will be funnier that way! And she was like all sad and I wasl ike if you get me a clementine you can read it tonight....AND SHE WENT!!!
      But brought it to me in a tissue...rude and disrespectful. Some will never learn....
       Oops I forgot I was writing in here. Well, I'm not one to write when I'm not feeling passionate, so I'll be going soon. Plus my thumbs and elbows = oww. Plus, it's ten to eleven! owwwch elbows. Yeah, peace out guys!!!

P.S. Go buy clementines. Don't care what your life story is. If you're up and reading this, then you go outside and START THE CAR AND FIND A STORE AND PUT YOUR BLINKER ON AND TURN AT THE APPROPRIATE TIME AND EXIT YOUR CAR AFTER PUTTING IT IN PARK AND WALK IN THE STORE AND BUY A  BOX OF CLEMENTINES AND EXIT THE STORE, RESTART THE CAR AND EXIT THE PARKING LOT THEN PROCEED BACK TO YOUR HOUSEHOLD AND EAT THE CLEMENTINE ACCORDING TO CLEMENTINE EATING CUSTOMS. If you are not familiar with said customs, please google them and then enjoy. Warning: the white stuff is bitter if there are huge chunks. Um anyway yeah do that and then report back to me!!!!
    I should find you a nice picture to convince.....

Yes!!! HOW FUCKING GOOD WOULD THAT TASTE?!??! GOOOOOO FINNNDDD OUT!!! Also: bigger is not always better. The brighter orange and more tender they are, the bettter they are, even if they're very small. Trust meeeee on this quality vs size. Alright, the elbows are gremlines biting their gremlin teeth through my "wenis" skin....I think it's my muscles actually. But from thyping, Yikes. The one tenden that goes from your ring finger to your elbow...type you'll feel it. Fucking OW I HAVE TO GO BYE!

This is just an experiment to see how my brain goes when I’m high.

New years day, 2011. 1:30 am

Listening to anything but fine by zox

Okay what I’m thinking right now….i’m thinking this song is so nice sounding. Like it’s a flow of strings of notes that just….floss their way through your ears, like they’re just gumlines, begging to be sliced through. It’s an Irish pride parade, it’s the fairy chimes. It’s my future wedding song with my future Irish husband.

Holy SHIT!!! That was the most complicated thing I’ve ever had to do in my fucking life. I was listening to Anything but fine, by zox, feeling really philosophical and shit, feeling like holy shit I’m going down some weird side streets in my brain, like I’m seeing new stuff I couldn’t access before, that’s where I feel I’m going, and I wanna write it down because I’m like “Holy shit! Irish! Fairies! Anything but fiiiine!” And what fucking happens? Well the way word opened up was annoying as shit, so I tried to change the view, and it like freezes on me, then opens on top of this desk or some shit? And I’m like whatever, this is kinda sick, so I try to write what I’m feeling, cuz anything but fine is climaxing, and I’m like whoa….good shit good shit gotta document this! And my fucking WORD PROCESSOR fails me at a time like this! Wtf man, if I change the view THAT DOESn’t mean download a whole new VERSION of it and don’t let me edit it. Sorry. Pissed me off and then I missed mentioning that some Joshua radin song played. We are okay, we are alright. Had to think about that for a second.

Wow…I’m talking…holy shit….I started this document 6 minutes ago? Wtf man that does not seem correct. I’ve been typing like a speed demon on crack with some of that loco mix of alcohol and energy drink plus four super doses of espresso….running from a t rex. That fast I’ve been typing for me to have only been typing for seven minutes, including that massive clusterfuck that I just described in the paragraph prior! Wow clusterfuck….that’s a good fucking word. I wanna try to incorporate that into the masterwork. It’s a teenage girl, she’s gonna hear or use the word sometime in her life. She’ll use it though. Because clusterfuck is a great word, and she’s gonna be the type of character who uses such a word and says it with fucking POWER because she is a MOTHER FUCKING BOSS WHO DIES AT 16 WHILE ICE FUCKING SKATING AND THEN HAS VISIONS OF HERSELF WHEN SHE FUCKING FELT LOVE? THAT’S LIKE DEEP ASS HARRY POTTER SHIT DUDE WTF THAT IS SICK. Whoa before I typed that all the bottom of the page said….you know the part where it sais Words: xxx our of xxx… well before I finished. Let me back up again. When you type for a long time, it doesn’t change numbers as you type, but it waits ti’ll you pause to recount the amount. So if you type for a long time quickly enough it won’t reload for a wihle. Anyway, I typed that whole sentence in caps and it was a long sentence and very heated and in that entire time, about halfway through I noticed that it said Words: 444 out of 444 and I was like HOOOOOOLLLLYYYYY SHIIIITTTTTT I need to keep typing and I need to tell them this but how am ai gonna explain it? I think….i dunno I just somehow had to stop and it updated and I was like “ohhhh shit!:”

Oh I was talking about the word clusterfuck. Yeah, my character is gonna use that word. Not sure what her name will be,,,I was just gonna play collie man but sunshine on my shoulders came on…but yeah good song

Anyway, what should her name be? Sydney? That’s a sick as fuck name that’s the fucking name of the MOST REXCOGNIZEABLE CITY IN AUSTRALIA, the most bad ass country ever in existence. Yes that has to be her name. Well Sydney…shje’s bad ass, and she doesn’t even know it, and at one point in the story I’m going to come across the perfecty opportunity to use the word clusterfuck, and she’s gonna pounce on that opportunity and the reader I SWEAR TO GOD will be like

“Wow. Sydney is badd ass. Like, damn…clusterfuck. What a great fucking word.”

That’s what the reader will think. Mr. Marshall, as he reads it, will think that. Those exact words will cross his mind. That’s what I’m saying…. HAHA ONE FOURTY FOUR AM SHIIIIIIIIIT

 Shit you guys. I was gonna take a fucking screen shot of that as soon as I noticed it and typed it out but then it changed to 45! Just like that! Lemme take a shot to prove it! 

Alright, I took it, and you can either believe that I seriously just took that now, or you can believe that this is all a giant lie, and I waited for 1:45 to come around to take a picture of it to prove this lie. I could not do that. I don’t even remember my original point and I’m going to have to backtrack and read what I’m saying to even get my head around it but….uimm yeah I could not do that.

Oh right, the 44 thing. Yeah so I was about to take a picture when it just jumped to 1:45! Bitches n ‘hoes boys, bitches ‘n hoes.

Well, I think I should definitely write parts of the masterwork high. Because Sydney is that type of power. That girl, she is me stoned. She is unintentionally hilarious, clever, spontaneous, snappy, chill, in tune, okay. She’s nothing remarkable, and that’s what makes her … her. Wash away by joe purdy

That’s playing right now. Whatever. Now that I recognize it I kinda wanna skip it. Here I go bitches. SHIT another joe purdy song “I love the rain the most” I wanted to skip it as soon as I saw it was that bitch, but it sounds tooooo cool to skip. Like, something about how the music is coming out for this song, its like invading my ears. Like I feel a physical pressure of the music pressing on my ears ow it kind of hurts… I’m sitting up. Whoa. Ow. And No, it is not loud, it’s been very quiet throughout all these songs and I haven’t touched the volume. No, it’s this songm and it’s elements, that are giving me that feeling. That’s how powerful it is and that’s why I couldn’t skip it immediately.

Haha like read that shit. I won’t now cuz I wanna appreciate it when I’m 100% sober, but whoever else who’s reading this, fucking read that shit!!! Who would ever say that in their right mind?! Fucking SYDNEY THIS IS HOW BAD ASS SHE IS.

I just thought of something. I should publish this in a facebook note. Whoa haha and then everyone would read it and be like “Who the fuck is Sydney” and “Why the fuck did becca type an essay on new years day” and “what shit did she smoke” but….it’d be funny. Yeah I wanna be Sydney.

She’s gonna be modeled after me! Of course. I will write a book when I’m older, just entirely the journal of a girl who smokes pot, and she’s gonna write about her life, but it’s going to be totally fictionalized, but somehow parallel to my life at that point