So I'm at the Purim Party

and as you may or may not have seen depending on whether we are facebook friends or not (there is probably like a 95% chance that we are and if you stumbled upon this blog via a media other than facebook, then congratulations! Or something.

Anyway, I said something about seeing my love at the Purim Party and I neglected to mention THERE WERE TWO.  Because one was this little bugger and now that I think about it I don't even know his name! But...well let me set the scene first.

For the uninitiated, Purim is an awesome Jewish holiday and there is a Purim party held every year by this awesome Jewish family that we know and it's usually held at Deering High School....but this year it was at this other place! So they have themes every year and this year it was Italian!!! So my mom dressed up as a village lady and my sister was the "mob wife" and anna was "the mob" and elizabeth was the venetian boat rower and I was the Italian flag by wearing green, white and red which Elizabeth pointed out were also Christmas colors...Lol!! Orthodox Jewish event!!

SO we sat down to hear the Megillah and these three little brothers (there may have been a fourth one, I'm not sure) ages 5-...9? I have no idea. Something around there. And they were the funniest little shits you wouldn't even believe how innocent they looked in their tuxedoed maffia outfits (fedoras included). And they were chatting us up the whooooole time and the little one with the felt cigar in his mouth just couldn't get enough of me and at the end (lol of like 1.5 hours) he was calling me his "broccoli" because I was wearing a green skirt. And he wanted to stand next to me at the end when we were watching the awesome - yet TOTALLY RANDOM AND COMPLETELY MISPLACED AT AN ORTHODOX JEWISH EVENT BUT LIKE IN A COMPLETELY POSITIVE WAY - skateboard/bike show thing. Anyway, I loved this little boy and he was the cutest little button I've ever seen but this is where I segue into duhn duhn duhn......

Becca's brain.....

Because this bike/skateboard show....

Had a biker.....

Who made 18 year old horizontal (WOWWWWW SO I HAD THIS POST UP FOR LIKE FOUR DAYS AND REREAD IT COUNTLESS TIMES BEFORE I REALIZED I SAID horizontal and MEANT HORMONAL god is that a freudian slip or fucking WHAT) and other word that also begins with h and o Becca go all "OMG"

But no I mean it when I say this dude was incredibly sexy in a small way and I never thought I'd find such small frames attractive and wow, am I shocking you with how deep we're going into my brain? Because I'm shocking myself, you don't belong here.

And yet....you're here....

Anyway, his name was Josh something aaaaaaaaaand heeeeeeeeee is a camp counselor at ramp camp at RYE Airfield aaaaaannnnnnd before we depart, let me just tell you a little tale of what the show was like.

There were two other kiddos (far less attractive therefore far less important but I guess that's mean so like yeah they accomplished things) who did tricks on a skateboard or Razor scooter type thingamajigger. This was accomplished in an open area by like 3.5, 4 foot tall ramps held up by a few beams and human support. So that may sound really sketchy or whatever especially when I tell you that Josh (it's not creepy that I know his name THEY SAID IT A MILLION TIMES) rides up these in a trick bike but...it was safe. However, he was doing extremely difficult moves for the amount of height he was able to achieve (a flip and a 180 or a 180 flip or something that involved flipping upside down and sticking it) aaaand he kept not landing them....

So then this lady who is sitting in front of me and who has kept looking at me whenever I cheer loudly for the performers starts talking to me.

She's all "I keep trying to tell him that the drinks are over there, he's been saying he's thirsty," referring to the little boy who calls me broccoli.

Immediately I think Uh no he's been saying broccoli I don't think he's useless and thirsty he is not a dumb shit and is fully capable of finding the refreshments himself why are you speaking to me as if I care about your existence right now But because I had to be so FUCKING POLITE I was like "Oh, is that what he's saying?"

Meanwhile, Elizabeth the Venetian Boat Rower is all "Did you see that?!"

And I'm all "See what?!"

No that's not what she saw but that's just to keep you guys going right now, because I'm staying up extra late to tell my story!

"He just landed it!" And everyone is freaking out and he landed the awesome stunt and I DIDN'T SEE IT BECAUSE of THE STUPID LADY THINKING A CHILD IS INCAPABLE AND SHE IS HIS SAVIOR.

Well I've had quite enough of that. It is the end of the week and I'm pooped!! You all have a lovely evening and if anyone knows this kid, you go ahead and talk me up because you and I both know I am cool, or as I've been recently informed, "Kool" because apparently COOL still means Constipated Overweighted Out-of-style Loser. Ciao!!